I said it. That three-letter word that makes grown people blush, preteens giggle, and teenagers grin.
I said it out loud in front of about 26 preteens last night.
I made the face for them…
The irony? In nursing school I couldn’t even say sex without blushing. When filling out a patient’s history, I could barely look up when I had to ask if he or she had any issues with his or her sexuality. I had to force the words out of my mouth and pray I could keep the red-hot patches about to over take my face at bay until I left the room.
Now I am sharing about purity in front of preteens and their parents. I challenged parents to use teaching opportunities to talk to their kids about sex. I encouraged them to buy the book series God’s Design for Sex in order to help open the dialog between them and their kids.
Tommy Nelson in his Song of Solomon Bible Study uses this analogy:
There was a town that had a river that ran through it. Along the river were restaurants, shops, and homes. One day a visitor to the town was sitting down to eat at the restaurant. Suddenly an alligator came out of the river and bit off the arm of a woman sitting near the river. When the visitor asked why no one had warned this woman about the alligators, the townspeople said, “We don’t talk about alligators.”
Is that how we as the Body of Christ treat sex? We can’t talk about it and so our families are being swallowed whole or a bit at a time by sexual sin. We can’t admit that we have a past and so we can’t broach the topic with our kids? Who is going to stop the cycle? Who is going to stand up and say that purity is possible with God’s help?
Talk about sex with your kids. Don’t put it off, don’t be ashamed.
Be real, be honest, and help set boundaries for your kids.
Teach them to guard the preciousness that is their purity. Save it for marriage.
Encourage your kids to save their first kiss for the marriage altar.
Discuss openly the appropriate age for dating.
Do not talk about sex as if it is dirty, instead share how it is God’s design to make a man and a woman one flesh.
Use every teaching moment God provides. Discuss dating in TV shows or movies. I tell my girls what I think about kissing and dating each time we see it in a movie or TV show.
Cover the whole dialog in the grace of God, knowing He forgives and restores. Romans 8:1
Remind them the freedom of God’s grace is not to indulge in sinful nature, but to serve others. Galatians 5:13
So from one former blusher to you, please warn your kids about the minefield of dating, sex, and purity. I am praying for you, will you pray for me?
What do you think about setting boundaries for dating and encouraging purity? What has worked for you and your family?