It isn’t easy being me. I don’t mean my life is harder than average. I mean it is exhausting being me.
One Saturday night my husband and I had an event to attend. I only had slight acquaintances with the attendees and a bad attitude. I didn’t want to go, I was uncomfortable, scared, and insecure. I am an awkward teenager again. The one who doesn’t know what to say, to wear, or to who she is. Mostly the awkward teenager in me fears she won’t be accepted.
About 24-hours later, we had another event to attend. This time I knew more of the attendees, I was confident, and excited about going. I had no doubts about what to wear, or say or do. What caused this severe case of social whip-lash? The ugly truth?
Sometimes I fear people more than I fear God. I am self-conscious instead of God-conscious. I want acceptance and I fear that I am not acceptable. So begins my list of things I am thankful for.
362. God’s forgiveness.
363. God refines me.
364. I enjoyed the event I dreaded.
366. Spring weather
367. Tears that cleanse
368. New doors opening
369. my husband
370. Nerf flag football
371. Nerf dart guns
372. the sound of my kids as they play together
374. friends who think, plan, and minister with
375. the girls I teach at church
377. God’s grace
378. worship music
379. worship living
380. time with my husband holding hands and dreaming dreams
What are you thankful for?